CROSSING SOCIAL LINES

I live in a mostly middle class world. And I don't think that's what the Lord wants. I think we are to bear one another's burdens (Galatians 6), that we are all one Body with different members, and that each member belongs to all the others (Romans 12). I don't want we who are middle class to be out of touch with the rest of the world. Its tempting to stay there and to not enter into problems of the other classes. How can I know about the struggles of others if I never hang around them? I came in touch in a fresh way today with people who are not like me, and that was a good thing. I went to a funeral today. Let me tell you about it. It was for a 22 year old woman who has struggled with drugs her whole life, because she was introduced to them as she ran drugs for her parents as a child. She got married and left that environment to try and get back on track. She wanted to be a lawyer to help others. She had a husband and a woman (my friend) who poured love into her and who tried to help her to change. She would stay clean for a while but always go back. She described it as being trapped in her own body and desperately longing to be free. Back and forth, in and out of the addiction. Last week she was robbed and murdered when she was downtown at 3AM trying to buy drugs. So that's the person whose funeral I attended. I know it is hard to hang out with people who are different from us, but I believe God calls us to not live sheltered lives away from everyone else's struggles. There are thousands of verses in the Bible talking about helping and loving the poor. Today, I encourage you to obey those verses and reach out to those who are different from you.

LIVING IN COMMUNITY

So I've been reading a book called Real Sex by Lauren Winner. What makes sex real in her terms is sex that is within the context of marriage as God designed it. In one part of the book she is making the case that we need to be in each others' lives and in each others' business to the extent that it helps our single brothers and sisters keep sex for marriage. She writes, "But the Bible tells us to intrude - or rather, the Bible tells us that talking to one another about what is really going on in our lives is in fact not an intrusion at all, because what's going on is already your concern; by dint of the baptism that made me your sister, my joys are your joys and my crises are your crises...Of course premarital sexual behavior is just one of many instances of this larger point. Christians also need to speak courageously and transparently about the seemingly private matter of Christian marriage - there would be, I suspect, a lot fewer divorces in the church if married Christians exposed their domestic lives, their fights and tensions and squabbles, to loving wisdom, advice and sometimes rebuke from the community. Christians might claim less credit card debt if small group members shared their bank account statements with each other. I suspect that if my best friend had permission to scrutinize my day timer, I would inhabit time better. (p53)"

BEAUTY IN WOMEN

This short little video has a lot to say about the world's lies about what defines beauty in women. I think its so important that we look at outward beauty as important, but beautiful even if it doesn't match the skinny models.

www.campaignforrealbeauty.com

THE BODY OF CHRIST

Last night there were 20 people from my church family over to celebrate one of us getting out of jail. My friends often come to my home, adults and kids of all ages, and make themselves at home. We were all packed in my little living room living life together. When one child bumps his head, we all reach down to help. Today I was at my friend's house who is just very overwhelmed. I got to help change the baby's diaper and load the dishwasher. Also today I went to another friend's child's grandparents day at their school. The grandparents weren't available, but I was. So I got to be their special friend and see their classroom. Family. God is great at creating it. We really all desperately need each other so much.

CHRISTIAN DATING

OK I've talked about this before but it keeps coming up. I did a kind of experiment on datng web sites and compared the Christian ones to the non Chrisitan ones. This was the first time I have been around a lot of single non Christians in a context of potential dating in a long time. The non Christian guys were so much nicer! They just talked so freely and were so much more interested in getting to know a girl than men I've encountered since I've been a believer. I've come to see how Christian guys don't talk to us women hardly at all! They aren't even friendly usually. And that's Christian guys lots of places, not just on the dating web sites. That's my experience at church, at the seminary, on the dating web sites, when I meet them at friends homes. What has the church done to make men this way? I feel frustrated because Christian single men hardly talk to me as a single woman. Since my job as a woman is to wait as I relate to men in a dating kind of way, then I am being prevented from learning more about relationships in a way that God intended. God said its not good for man to be alone, he created marriage and it is good. What if the thing that is preventing me from being married right now is the fact that my husband is listening to whatever it is that tells him to not talk to CHristian single women very much or very deeply. Its like Satan is having his way at preventing Christian marriages because men are buying into something that is telling them they can't develop relationships with women. What's going on?

GOD'S GOODNESS

Is God good? Is God good to me? I've had this discussion so many times and with so many people. Its something that many many believers ask, deep down in their hearts. How can a child be sexually abused and God still be good to them? How can we loose our 4th job and God still be good to us? Those questions are there, nagging at our hearts until we face them. I believe that the Word tells us, and I have discovered, that if we come to God with these questions then he will give us the answer. But sometimes we have to wrestle with it and with him for a while. Sometimes we have to open our hearts up deep and let the fears and doubts out so that they can be proven wrong. But its more than just proof. Its God. Its so big that its beyond proof. And we have to put it honestly out there so God can show us, like he showed Job, and everybody else who has ever asked, that he is a good God and that he loves us.

TRUE AND FALSE GUILT

So I got dumped last week, and it turned out to be a great object lesson for my women's group on guilt. We are talking about how to discern true guilt from false guilt. True guilt is conviction by the Holy Spirit that we have sinned. We can be free from true guilt by asking forgiveness from the Holy Spirit because we are cleansed by the blood of Christ. That and that alone frees and saves us. So its done by the blood and we don't have to add to it. We can't add to it.

And then there's false guilt. That is when you let someone else's opinion define who you are instead of God. So that would be if I let being dumped define who I am. But that has nothing to say about who I am at my core. The gospel defines who I am. I was bought with the blood of Jesus and I am being changed and restored more every day, and that's where my worth lies. I have infinite worth, and a guy not wanting to date me doesn't touch that. So I can be sad, but I don't have to wallow in false guilt. I can be free of it also as I recognize it for the lie that it is.