LIVING IN COMMUNITY

So I've been reading a book called Real Sex by Lauren Winner. What makes sex real in her terms is sex that is within the context of marriage as God designed it. In one part of the book she is making the case that we need to be in each others' lives and in each others' business to the extent that it helps our single brothers and sisters keep sex for marriage. She writes, "But the Bible tells us to intrude - or rather, the Bible tells us that talking to one another about what is really going on in our lives is in fact not an intrusion at all, because what's going on is already your concern; by dint of the baptism that made me your sister, my joys are your joys and my crises are your crises...Of course premarital sexual behavior is just one of many instances of this larger point. Christians also need to speak courageously and transparently about the seemingly private matter of Christian marriage - there would be, I suspect, a lot fewer divorces in the church if married Christians exposed their domestic lives, their fights and tensions and squabbles, to loving wisdom, advice and sometimes rebuke from the community. Christians might claim less credit card debt if small group members shared their bank account statements with each other. I suspect that if my best friend had permission to scrutinize my day timer, I would inhabit time better. (p53)"