TAKING MEDICINE FOR DEPRESSION PART 2

Here's a perfect example of what I was talking about in the last post. I am sick today and so I didn't get up very well this morning. Actually shortly after I got up, I just went and lay down on the couch and fell asleep again. So I didn't take my medicine. And then when I woke up again at 1pm just a minute ago, then I was thinking really crazy thoughts. Very negative and cynical. I stopped and thought to myself "what's wrong with me?" and I prayed and asked that I could think clearly. I was not too far gone into negative thoughts at all - at that point if I still had not taken my medicine I would have probably been able to last even the next few days or weeks fighting off those negative thoughts instead of acting on them. But then when I went into the kitchen II realized that I had not taken my meds and that that was why I was struggling so with my thoughts being so irrationally hopeless. This same thing happened a few weeks ago when I simply forgot to take my medicine, which I rarely do. Then I felt the same kinds of feelings, which include feeling very anxious, sure that everything was horrible in the world and was going to go even more horribly, sure that there's no hope. This is the result of not being properly medicated, and we know that for a fact, because there was a time just a couple of months ago that I had no medicine in me for weeks. And the results are something that not even I am willing to be that vulnerable about with this many people on the world wide web! But let me assure you, it was very out of control. Scary stuff, the person I could be if I did not have medicine. No wonder those who struggled with depression long ago often died in their twenties. It really wears you down.